The Pursuit of Happiness: Accepting the Spectrum of Emotions
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Defining Happiness
Recently, I took a moment to reflect on what “happiness” truly means to me. I concluded that it is the fleeting experience of success intertwined with contentment.
Success can take many forms, from significant achievements like earning a degree or purchasing a home, to smaller victories such as mastering a yoga pose or replicating a hairstyle seen online. In both grand and minor instances, achieving something brings a sense of fulfillment, even if it lasts only for a moment.
Contentment, on the other hand, represents a state of peace. In moments of true contentment, we are not preoccupied with thoughts about future tasks or worries; we simply relish in our present existence.
Happiness is that brief juncture where success meets contentment.
The Illusion of Constant Happiness
For an extended period, I devoted myself to maintaining a constant state of happiness. I used to believe that if I wasn’t happy, it meant I was failing at life. However, I am gradually accepting that happiness is a transient emotion, and that’s perfectly acceptable. If perpetual happiness were the norm, how would we recognize it for the treasure that it is?
The Societal Pressure to Be Happy
Our culture often promotes the idea that we should be happy at all times, even offering step-by-step guides on how to achieve this elusive state:
- Purchase a new vehicle
- Attain a higher education
- Secure a lucrative career
- Find your soulmate
- Invest in a spacious home
- Raise a couple of children
- Climb the corporate ladder
- Upgrade your car
- Expand your living space
- Showcase your accomplishments on social media
Masking True Emotions
As I was growing up, I frequently heard advice to hide my less-than-happy feelings for the comfort of others. This societal expectation caused discomfort among those around me, and I noticed role models like my mother and teachers conforming to this behavior. Consequently, I adopted this habit in both public and private settings, leading to additional stress in my life.
While it’s essential to be mindful of how our emotions might impact others, it’s unnecessary to mask our true feelings with a façade of constant happiness. People can often sense when someone is not being genuine. It’s perfectly acceptable to express that you feel okay or indifferent, and this authenticity may even be appreciated more than forced cheerfulness.
Rethinking Emotional Value
The phrase “less than” in my earlier reflections raises an intriguing point: it suggests that happiness is the ultimate emotion, while anything below it is deemed inferior. What if we viewed our feelings not as a hierarchical list but as a broad spectrum? These “lesser” emotions could be acknowledged and accepted as part of the human experience.
While we shouldn’t seek to wallow in misery, striving for perpetual happiness can lead to disappointment, ultimately causing us to feel worse than if we had simply embraced our emotional spectrum.
Emotions are not merely black and white; they encompass a range of states that we often overlook. If we disregard these nuanced feelings, how can we genuinely understand ourselves?
What does happiness mean to you? How do you define success and contentment? I invite you to share your thoughts on this topic.
In the video "You Can't Be Happy All The Time," the speaker discusses the unrealistic expectations of constant happiness and encourages viewers to accept the ebb and flow of emotions.
The video "You are not meant to be happy. So stop trying!" explores the idea that happiness isn’t a permanent state and emphasizes the importance of embracing all emotions.