Finding Balance: Knowing When to Let Go and Move Forward
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Chapter 1: The Climb of Life
In 1996, a team of climbers embarked on the daunting journey to conquer Mount Everest. Reaching an altitude of 29,000 feet, they faced conditions that challenge human survival, with a staggering one in four not returning. The film "Everest" depicts these climbers aware of an impending storm, forcing them to race against time to summit and descend safely.
Imagine investing $65,000, undergoing extensive training, and visualizing the peak, only to confront a pivotal moment: It's time to turn back. You can either abandon your dream or risk everything for that elusive summit.
Inside your mind, two voices clash:
One, a daring spirit: "Only the bold make history."
The other, a nurturing reminder: "Turn back and live to fight another day."
This internal struggle leads to a phenomenon dubbed “Summit Fever.” Despite the risks, the climbers pushed on, reaching the summit, only to face tragic consequences on their descent.
We all encounter crossroads in life, questioning:
Should I remain in this job?
Is this relationship worth saving?
Should I finally commit to sobriety?
The inner conflict ensues:
Sure, I’m constantly fatigued, and stress is weighing me down, yet this high-level position and its lucrative paycheck are hard to give up. I can take a break once I retire.
The relationship feels stagnant, but part of me clings to the hope that we can revive it. We’re still here and haven’t tried every option yet.
I’ve launched two businesses that failed, but there are stories of persistence, where success comes after multiple attempts. I’m still standing and haven’t explored every avenue.
When does one acknowledge that enough is truly enough?
Section 1.1: The Dream vs Purpose Conundrum
Dreams are fleeting achievements we encounter throughout life. You can accumulate countless dreams, yet you won’t fulfill them all. While they hold significance, they merely contribute to a larger mosaic.
Purpose, however, is the overarching narrative of your life. It surpasses dreams in importance, embedded in daily living regardless of external conditions. For instance, my purpose is to “live life to the fullest.” But what does that entail? For me, it means embracing success, community, and joy.
More specifically:
Success: Uncovering and honing my natural talents, and maximizing my contributions to others.
The activities that ignite your passion, where people seek your expertise, and that you would pursue even without compensation. Mastering these skills to the point where others express gratitude and are willing to reward you is life's ultimate purpose.
Community and Relationships: Surrounding myself with individuals who recognize and celebrate my intrinsic worth. Building connections with those who honor my journey is vital. That’s the essence of love — the purpose of life.
Pleasure: Embracing every experience fully.
The elation of triumph and the sorrow of loss, feeling both turmoil and tranquility. Being fully present allows us to appreciate the subtleties of life. Experiencing the breadth of the human condition is where I find my deepest fulfillment — that is the purpose of life.
The climbers could almost taste their dreams, yet their intuition warned them: “It’s time to return.” Yet the mountain beckoned, leading them away from their true purpose.
Section 1.2: Understanding Your Everest
Everest represents your dreams — significant but not paramount. It’s essential, yet it should not overshadow your true purpose.
What is your Everest?
What compels you with urgency, even against your better judgment?
Consider if your Everest is the desire to drink alcohol in moderation. Your noble intentions might include connecting with others, spreading joy, seeking freedom, or pursuing pleasure. Yet, beneath the surface might lie insecurity — the need to be perceived as "cool," "attractive," or "funny."
Why compromise your values for validation?
Why sacrifice your well-being to gain acceptance or comfort from others?
Some challenges are beyond our control: the loss of a loved one, job termination, or unforeseen disasters. Other struggles, however, we tolerate but can escape from.
If you’re going to take a risk, make sure it’s for the right cause. Pursue your purpose: sharing your unique talents, serving others, and seeking those who genuinely love you without conditions. Allow yourself to experience everything, including the tranquility that comes from knowing you can handle life's challenges.
Prioritize security. Recognize your worth; don’t seek validation through achievement. Choose purpose over pride.
Distinguish your dreams from your purpose.
Striving to find the ideal method to drink responsibly is merely a dream.
Choosing sobriety could be your pivotal moment of letting go.
By stepping back, you open the door to a richer life. It’s more than sufficient — it far exceeds the narrow ambition of enjoying casual drinks with friends or feeling attractive with a glass of wine on a date.
There’s so much more to life.
Enduring a relationship with someone who doesn’t truly understand or support you is akin to chasing Everest. Ending that relationship could be your moment of clarity.
Turning back leads to far greater rewards than the exhausting dream of feeling “chosen” and never being alone again.
What is your Everest?
May you gain clarity to differentiate between dreams and purpose.
May you discover that surrender can be unexpectedly fulfilling.
May you choose to embrace the abundant life you are meant to live.
Thanks for reading,
Jenna
What’s New This Month?
I’ve become an Auntie (again)!
I celebrated my 34th birthday while initiating a significant life change.
A client successfully launched a satellite into space! Read more here.
Bardelia honored women-owned businesses and welcomed its first external investor! Use code JENNA20 at checkout.
Jenna
Jenna Lou is the founder of the Sober Reference Podcast and a Medium blogger. She is dedicated to simplifying the journey toward better health, career, and relationship intelligence. As a former Division 1 athlete, CPA, life coach, and CFO who has overcome eating disorders and chronic drinking habits, she believes in the transformative power of human resilience.
Receive "Letters From Lou" for free every Saturday morning (click here).
Chapter 2: Lessons from Everest
In this TEDx talk, Sarah Weiler discusses the importance of knowing when to quit and the value of strategic decision-making in our lives.
Chapter 3: The Cost of Quiet Quitting
This video explores the concept of "quiet quitting" and the impact it has on our professional and personal lives.